>You might be a military spouse if…


You might be a military spouse if…

…You live on your own, by yourself more after you’re married than before you were married.

…You know all of your husband’s coworkers by their last name, and rarely know their first name or even gender.

…Your husband’s work and dress clothes cost more than yours do.

…You only write in pencil because EVERYTHING is subject to change.

…You know that a 2 month separation IS short, no matter what your civilian friends say.

…You have enough camouflage in your house to wallpaper the White House.

…You don’t bat an eyelash at 22:45 and 0300 duty times.

…You are asked to stop talking in acronyms and translate it all to English.

…You’ve done more oil changes than your spouse, and even when your husband is home the mechanic asks to speak with you.

…You ask someone to hold on a second by saying, “Stand by.”

…Military homecomings on TV bring tears to your eyes because you can relate so well.

…You’ve ever checked your email multiple times an hour in hopes your spouse has written you, and know how horrible email being “down” is.

…You wouldn’t dream going anywhere without your cellphone, and all your other numbers forward to it.

…You’ve researched ways to surgically attach your cellphone to yourself.

…If you have a power of attorney, USE it, and freak out when it expires.

…If you know that not everyone accepts a power of attorney, despite the fact it gives you permission to practically BE your spouse.

…If you’ve ever argued that fact with someone in person or over the phone and gotten nowhere.

…Your husband spends more time getting ready for a formal function than you do, and on an average day spends way too much time ironing, polishing shoes, and shaping his beret.

…You can literally hold down the fort while your spouse is deployed or in the field.

…You know that ‘dependant’ means anything but.

…the floorboard of your car is littered with french fries, yellow foam earplugs and chem lights.

…you’ve shopped in the Class Six while being noticeably pregnant and explained to the unfazed clerk that you’re “just buying stuff for my husband.”

…you lean to the right while driving on post so the MP’s won’t see you talking on your cell phone.

…you’ve ever wished your husband would get the Medal of Honor so you could get front row parking.

…you know better than to shop the Commissary on the first or fifteenth day of the month.

…you have a “favorite gate guard.”

…you don’t feed your kids before FRG meetings but plan to let them fill up on brownies and Sprite once they get there.

…you watch “Army Wives” just to yell at the TV whenever something is unrealistic.

…you’ve ever stopped your husband on the way to work because of pair of your panties was stuck to his velcro.

…you plan a special day because of the words “Case Lot Sale.”

…you’ve ever had a nightmare that involved not knowing ”your sponsor’s last four.”

…you know all the words to “Blood on the Risers” but still cringe when you hear it.

…you save an especially stinky shirt to get you through a deployment

…you think the only thing sexier than ACU’s on a man are ACU’s off a man.

…your sentences start containing more [acronyms] and numbers than actual words.

…you refer to everyone not in the military or dating someone in the military as a Civilian, you can rattle off the time in perfect military time without having to think.

…you start referring to all girls & women as “females”

…you tell the timeline of your past through deployments.

…you think 6 months away from your husband is “not bad”

…you can’t remember the last four digits of your own social security #

…you constantly have to explain to businesses on the phone that your husband can’t call to fix the problem because he’s in the middle of a desert somewhere.

I found this on a friend’s blog and laughed out lout at these! Hope you enjoyed the laugh as much as I did! (But I admit, I have to do the math to figure out military time!)

About Jennifer

"Yes, they're all mine." The answer to the question I hear most often.
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